Say it.
In 2021, my husband and I made a bold decision: In 2025, we will sail around the world.
We kept that idea to ourselves for a while because… frankly, it sounded a bit mad! After all, with all the commitments and obligations of our life, who were we to simply put it to one side to chase an adventure? When we finally started to share this crazy idea with friends and family, we were met with a lot of wide eyes, open mouths, and a few polite "Wow, that's... ambitious!" reactions.
The interesting thing was, their reactions didn’t really matter. Not because I don’t care what other people think (ah, maybe someday!), but because each time I said it, the dream became more and more real. That feeling of ‘realness’ meant more to me than how other people felt about it. And fast forward to today - it couldn’t get more real. I’m writing this from the middle of the Pacific Ocean on our way to the Galapagos Islands. Looking back, I can see that it’s a fact that sharing this goal, out loud, with other human beings, was an essential step - emotionally and practically - for making into a reality.
The power of saying your Big Hairy Audacious Goal (BHAG) out loud isn't new to me. At 23, I was feeling frustrated and stuck in so many ways. Sort of out of the blue, the idea to train for a marathon came to me, primarily as a way to give myself something positive to focus on. The catch? I’d never been much of a runner. As I talked myself into and out of this idea on a daily basis, I bought a book called ‘The Non-Runner’s Marathon Trainer’ by David Whitsett. I’ll paraphrase chapter one. It said: Tell someone you're training for a marathon. Do not read chapter two until you’ve completed this step. The author explained that sharing the existence of this goal with someone else would create a form of accountability and in turn, a burst of momentum and motivation.
I remember cringing as I shared this goal with a friend the very same day I read chapter one. I was scared to say it out loud because - What if I didn't follow through? What if I found that I couldn't do it? The fear made a bit of a ramble of my declaration.
‘So, I think I’m going to train for a marathon. No. Well, the book I’m reading about training for a marathon says I need to tell someone I’m training for a marathon. So…I’m training for a marathon.’
And the book was right - after saying out loud to another actual human being, the next steps were clear and I had the motivation and accountability I needed to take action. I started to tell more people and slowly, this wild idea transformed into to something I was actually doing. And for what it’s worth, about 8 months later, I did finish that marathon, and I know two things about it. 1) It was one of the most rewarding experiences of my life. I learned so much about myself and I found myself out of my little life/career rut before I’d even finished training! 2) It 100% would not have happened if I hadn’t shared the goal with other people in my life.
I get to witness the power of sharing a BHAG in my coaching practice regularly, and I’ve got to say, it’s one of my favourite parts of my job. Clients tell me things like:
I want to look for a new job.
I want to move to a new country.
I want to put myself forward for a leadership position.
I want to work 15% fewer hours this year than I did last year.
I want to lead my team to exceed all expectations and have fun doing it.
It’s a fun and rewarding part of the work because often times, they’ve danced around their seemingly wild idea for a while. But the moment they say it out loud, simply and clearly, there’s a shift. They feel it, I feel it, and we both know what’s coming next. Clarity, energy, motivation, accountability.
I’ve come to believe in BHAGs so much that I teach it as part of my online course and I write mine down almost every day. In pulling this newsletter together though, I realized I need to take my own medicine here. Because it’s not enough to have a dream. At some point, you’ve got to SAY IT for it to become a reality. So here it goes:
I want to be strong enough to do 5 full push-ups (on toes!).
I want to understand sailing mechanics enough to be able to make decisions (not just follow instructions).
I want to create a marketing machine for Progress with Purpose that runs smoothly with little time and energy from me.
I want to create a body of writing on this trip that informs my future endeavors as an author and public speaker.
I know I’ll feel scared to hit send on this email because I don’t yet know exactly how I’ll accomplish these goals - success is not at all guaranteed. But I’ve been plugging away at these on my own for a while now. And I’ve just made the decision that I’m willing to pay the price of a bit of fear in exchange for what I value greatly - energy and momentum. Rest assured, I’ll let you know how it goes!
CURIOSITY PROMPTS
What's one bold goal you haven’t said out loud yet? Share it with me by replying to this email (I still answer every email!) or telling someone close to you. Let’s make it real together.
Oh, and here’s a tip. If you aren’t a little bit scared to tell people the goal, it’s a sign that it’s not big enough. No tingle or slight hesitation? Go BOLDER. (And conversely, if you do feel that scare-ited feeling, take it as a sign that you are on the right track!)
BONUS CONTENT
At that stage where you aren’t quite sure WHAT goal you want to pursue? That’s really common. Which is why I created a tool to support leaders to find the headspace and time they need to generate clarity. Check it out!
WRITE YOUR NEXT CHAPTER
My work as a Leadership Coach continues from the high seas! If you are thinking about how to write your next chapter, feel free to check out ways to partner with me HERE.
In all curiousness,
Joy
P.S. If/when the spirit ever moves you or you have questions - always feel free to get in touch and let me know what’s coming up for you!
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