Tuning in.
‘Alright, let’s get up the mast and get this done,’ my husband chirped.
It was getting late into the morning and we had a few jobs to take care of around the boat before the day got away from us. David was getting antsy, and truth be told, so was I. I’d agreed to be hoisted up the mast of our sailboat - all 22 meters of it - in order to take care of a couple of essential maintenance jobs.
‘Yes. Let’s do it.’ I was feeling some butterflies in my stomach and really just wanted to get it over with.
On the bow of the boat, I stepped into my harness and set up my radio so that I’d be able to communicate with my crew mates far below me. David was recapping what I needed to do once I got to the top, but I was focused on my inner dialogue. A loud part of my brain was saying:
‘No. I should not do this. What if I fall? This is not safe. I should play it safe. I don’t have to do this if I don’t want to.’
Then, in that very instant, my mind flicked back to an email I’d received a couple of months back from a client I’d worked with last year. I know that sounds odd - that a professional email would come to mind while maintaining my boat in the middle of the Pacific. I smiled though because I knew exactly why it was cropping up. I’d read that email several times when it came through, certain that a little nugget of wisdom I’d found there was going to come in handy one day. And apparently today was that day.
Here’s the excerpt from that email from my client that really stuck with me:
“I’ve learned so much…but I think one of the biggest lessons has been that if it doesn’t feel right, it’s not right. But the scared/excited* feeling you mentioned is different from the ‘Not Right’ feeling. And I can tell the difference now. I’m tuning in hard core to what I really want, so that I can ensure my actions align with my goals…”
‘Okay, so which is it?’, I thought. Is this a really bad idea or am I just a bit scared? A quick check-in with the tingly sensation in my gut told me: It’s not that this task doesn’t feel right, I’m just nervous as I’ve never done this before. But I’m also excited to do something bold, challenging and new!
Then, I took a quick look around me and noticed: I’ve got the right equipment, and I’ve got the right crew to support me through this.
David was finished with his instructions and tips, and I was all clipped in.
Taking a moment to tune in made me feel ready enough to say, ‘Okay. Enough talking about it. Let’s go.’
Highlights of this experience:
The view, of course! The crystal clear aqua waters, the surrounding boats, my teeny-tiny crew on deck. Just take a look at the pics I captured while I was up there! (Zoom in on the 3rd pic to see the sharks circling our boat!)
When I was about half-way up, I heard the little girl on our a friend’s boat next to us say: ‘Mom! Look at Joy!’ It occurred to me that maybe she hadn’t seen any of the female crew do this before and it fueled me on.
My crew, supporting my ascent and descent, and in my ear the whole time. All of us communicating what was happening, where I was, the pace that was needed and words of encouragement.
My timer for the banana bread I had in the oven going off on my phone while I was at the top! (It turned out a little browned on top but still delicious.)
Getting the jobs done. A big sense of accomplishment in showing up for my boat and my crew.
On my way up I told my crew to take pictures because I probably wouldn’t be doing this again. After I got down, I knew for sure I would.
Most of all though, it was a great reminder that feeling ‘I’m scared,’ and thinking ‘This is a bad idea,’ can be easily muddled, but they are not necessarily the same thing. Tuning in is what allows us to tell the difference. And when we don’t take the time to tune in, we risk missing out on success for ourselves and the people we lead.
* A.K.A. Scare-ited
CURIOSITY PROMPTS
What does your ‘This is not right’ feeling feel like? Where in your body do you feel it?
What does your ‘Scare-ited’ feeling feel like? Where in your body to you feel it?
Where in your professional or personal life could you practice differentiating the two feelings?
Once you’ve spent some time on the above, if you’ve concluded that a situation, decision or action is ‘not right’ for you, what, if any, ‘equipment’ (tools, data, information) or crew (support) would you need in order for it to feel more aligned?
BONUS CONTENT
Powerful leaders know how to tune in. But that can be easier said than done when it feels like we are being pulled in a million directions. This is why I created a tool to support leaders to find the headspace and time they need to generate clarity. Check it out!
WRITE YOUR NEXT CHAPTER
My work as a Leadership Coach continues from the high seas! If you are thinking about how to write your next chapter, feel free to check out ways to partner with me HERE.
In all curiousness,
Joy
P.S. If/when the spirit ever moves you or you have questions - always feel free to get in touch and let me know what’s coming up for you!
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